Updated on August 5, 2015
50 Shades Freed – Chapter Two
Ana was conveniently dreaming about her wedding day (EXPOSITION!) and woke up on her back, sans bikini top. Christian is livid that her boobs are no longer his.
Read Chapter One.
Fifty Shades Freed
“I was on my front. I must have turned over in my sleep,” I whisper weakly in my defense.
How about just saying, “They’re my boobs and I’ll flash them if I want to”?
He scoops my bikini top from his sun lounge.
I CANNOT roll my eyes any harder.
Christian reminds her that they are constantly being followed by security men and paparazzi. Ana’s a big shot now so she keeps forgetting about their entourage.
He pulls on his shorts, even though his trunks are dripping wet.
Maybe Christian’s enjoying this rather more than he’s letting on?
He remains silent, brooding and bad-tempered, and it’s all my fault.
Jesus, it was a fucking MISTAKE.
Christian leads me onto the dock, where the motorboat and Jet Ski are moored.
I don’t know why she has capitalised jet ski.
Christian kicks the Jet Ski away from the dock.
So last chapter was ‘sun lounge’. It looks like this is the chapter of the ‘Jet Ski’.
They arrive at the yacht (after many more mentions of the Jet Ski) and Christian seems a bit happier.
“You think I’m going to punish you? Do you want to?”
Do you want ME to. Grammar.
The steward appears with our drinks and snacks and places them on the teak table.
IT’S TEAK BECAUSE HE’S RICH. GET IT?
“It’s odd. Going from nothing to” – I wave my hand to indicate our opulent surroundings – “to everything.”
Yes, a middle-class life is certainly ‘coming from nothing’.
“You’ll get used to it.”
“I don’t think I’ll ever get used to it.”
You’ve forgotten that you have a security detail. You’ve gotten used to it.
Oh God no it’s time for another freaking flashback. This time to their conversation about pre-nups.
“I’m not discussing this again,” Christian snaps at Carrick. “No prenup!”
Why? Is he simply too romantic now?
“Ana, this is not about you,” Carrick murmurs.
It is. It is entirely about her.
End of flashback. Ana pushes the bowl of nuts towards Christian and he says, “I’m nuts about you.” For the love of all that is holy, stop.
Oh my, the look he gives me could be solely responsible for global warming.
Because it’s … laden with CO2?
“I’m going to make an example of you. Come. Don’t pee,” he whispers in my ear.
Taking sexy talk to a whole new level.
They go to the yacht bedroom and he strips, then gets out a pair of handcuffs.
Handcuffs! We’ve never used handcuffs. Where the hell is he going to attach those?
On your HANDS.
Thank heavens I’m married to this man, otherwise this would be embarassing.
Yeh, sure, that’s how sex works.
He grasps my left leg and snaps one cuff around my ankle.
Well, colour me surprised, he’s using them on her feet.
He blindfolds her and gets her to hug her knees, then he handcuffs each foot to its corresponding hand, so she’s all tied up in a nice handcuffy bundle.
Oh my. I am so aroused … already.
That would be because of all the sexy things you’re doing.
This feels weird – being trussed up and helpless – on a boat.
Sure, on land you’d just roll off down the street like it doesn’t matter.
“Now,” Christian breathes, “I’m going to fuck you till you scream.”
He said he’s going to fuck you till you scream.
He rears up and slams into me. I scream.
He slams into me again, thrusting so deep, and I’m building…
I still don’t know why he told her not to pee.
This is too intense. I can’t stop him. I don’t want to stop him … I want … I want … oh no, oh no … this is too …
Possibly the most coherent sentence EL James has ever written.
I detonate around him, screaming loudly as my orgasm rips me apart.
He uncuffs her and they go to sleep. The next morning they wake up, unfortunately.
I stare at myself in the mirror, shocked. Holy fuck! What has he done to me?
Another chapter ending on a cliffhanger. Oh, the tension.
More next week!
Read Chapter Three.